"... Be humble, thinking of others better than yourselves." (cf Phil. 2:23, NLT).
"... Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love," (cf Eph. 4:2, NLT).
Respect has its limits. The Roman Empire demanded people to take a loyalty oath: "Caesar is Lord." However, Christians refused and would only admit: "Jesus is Lord." Some were martyred for this refusal and defiance of Rome. We must render to Caesar that which is Caesar's and to God that which is God's (cf. Matt. 22:21). Only God deserves our ultimate loyalty, reverence, and worship. We must draw the line somewhere. Respect is part of the Ten Commandments where we are to honor our parents and this is inclusive to mean authority figures as Peter said, to fear God and to honor the king but notice he said to honor all men (cf. 1 Pet. 2:17).
The kind of crowd we hang out with may not be God's kind of people and we should know that bad company corrupts good morals (cf. 1 Cor. 15:33). Choose your friends carefully. Show love with discernment (cf. Phil. 1:9). We don't want the unbeliever to spoil us instead of us influencing them. Now, be a good neighbor! We must love our neighbors even if they are not our friends; even the wicked people respect and love their friends and we would be no better than them.
Love is an expression of respect. As Jesus said to love our neighbors, this begs the question of who our neighbor is: Anyone in our obit or circle of influence that needs us and that we can express love to by deeds, not just empty words. The Bible exhorts us to respect those to whom it is due and honor to who it is due (cf. Rom. 13:7). It also says that honor is not becoming a fool (cf. Prov. 26:8). People can say “With all due respect,” but intend to insult them at the same time. But sometimes it's difficult to show respect, and this may be the case in such situations as in the armed forces where we respect the position even if we don't like them personally. We respect our elders for this reason too.
We must realize that what the world respects and esteems is not God's value system. When we appraise a person by his worldly accomplishments such as success, fame, power, wealth, or even just because he's achieved the American dream or has good credentials such as education, status, or reference, when we evaluate a person in these ways we are succumbing to the devil's appraisal means and not what God values such as virtue, character, hard work, loyalty, faithfulness, wisdom, being an elder, or an authority figure.
But we are never to show scorn or disdain because everyone is in God's image even if it is tarnished they have rights and dignity and worth as human beings. Learn to be civil and overlook someone's faults. Even criminals in America have rights. We must regard them that God finds pleasure in and show them worthy of our honor. We show respect in many ways including being polite, courteous, not even exploiting them, but giving people a break and the benefit of the doubt, and sometimes, it's as simple as showing gratitude and not taking advantage of them. Sometimes it is necessary to level with people or offer constructive criticism and speak the truth in love (cf. Eph. 4:15).
It can become problematic to respect and show patience with those who disagree with us, even in politics or doctrinal matters; there are gray areas and we must allow for differences of opinion or even conviction, realizing that the Great Commission is not to convert to our opinions or convictions but to Jesus--we don't preach a creed but a Person. Now, what is the difference between an opinion and a conviction? You hold opinions but convictions hold you! If you may be willing to die for it, it's probably a conviction. Respect a person's right to an opinion or conviction different from yours.
As far as doctrines go, or church dogma, there are major and minor doctrines affecting orthodox faith and then there's heresy. Don't be contentious or argumentative but patient, showing love with restraint and compassion if possible. There are doctrines that sincere believers beg to differ on. Don't major in the minors! Keep the main thing the main thing! If the issue affects salvation, it's orthodox and worth fighting for, but some disagreements are not worth the adrenaline and generate more heat than light. There were certain doctrines the Church Fathers defended and wrote apologetic books against denouncing heresy. We are to" "earnestly contend for the faith: (cf. Jude 3). Augustine quite appropriately said, "In essentials, unity; in nonessentials, liberty; in all things, charity."
Respect shows understanding. Going hand in hand with knowing God is knowing ourselves. The Greeks of antiquity said, "Know thyself." This entails self-respect as the assumption. If we do find this out, the revelation will be that we'll realize the picture isn't a pretty one because we are all flawed creatures who have feet of clay or weaknesses that are not readily apparent.
For this reason, we must humbly judge our fellow man and say, "There but for the grace of God go I." (George Whitefield). Paul confessed similarly: "I am what I am by the grace of God." (cf. 1 Cor. 15:10). If we do judge someone, remember your sinfulness and their humanness. Give them a break! Remember: "There is, therefore, no condemnation for those who in Christ Jesus..." (cf. Romans 8:1). When we know ourselves and God, we can respect others who need God.
We are but a step from death and must acknowledge the grace God gives us that we take for granted. Our self-assessment should echo Paul's who saw himself as the chief of sinners and of John Bunyan who wrote his autobiography, Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners. Reflecting on the fact that grace is getting what we do not deserve, cannot pay back, cannot earn, nor even improve upon! Only God knows the cost of our salvation that Jesus paid. None of us deserves our blessings. We are all the recipients of grace and good from God (cf. Psalm 149:5; James 1:17).
Another sign of respect and salvation is the inclination to forgive and not to be harsh in your judgments. We must forbear and forgive one another as the Lord forgave us (cf. Col 3:13). Remember that if we cannot show forgiveness and mercy to others we may not have experienced it ourselves. Once you've experienced it, you want to pass it on! Some people just need to learn a little respect!
In showing our love for our neighbor as is the second of the two greatest commandments, sometimes we must show love to the unlovely or the unloved, love can be difficult and God doesn't require a touchy-feely type of love but to demonstrate it with our deeds. Love can be tough! Anyone can tell someone they love them, but do they live it out? Don't let it be mere lip service. The Golden Rule comes to mind and this is the highest ethic ever offered; Jesus truly raised the bar and He actually lived it out. He practiced what He preached and preached what He practiced without duplicity. Soli Deo Gloria!
