"... We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God.." (Acts 14:22, NIV).
We all have to go through the refining fires of God's trials and tribulations or confront our hour of trial and decision in God's crucible to prove our faith is genuine, and to find out what manner of people we are. Don't break faith in crises, because we all have to pay our dues. To be rewarded you must endure to the end and follow Jesus through thick and thin, regardless the cost--we have committed ourselves to taking up our cross. Jesus faced His great confrontation between Himself and the cross at Gethsemane, knowing what He was getting into, He had second thoughts and besought the Father for another way, if at all possible. It was like having a moment of truth spiritually and He found out who He really was (and may have suffered an identity crisis)--the only way for our salvation. His prayer of relinquishment, committing Himself to the Father's will and ratifying it (i.e., not using His divine powers independently), settled matters for Him and assured that His sacrifice would be totally voluntary and not coerced. It was the Father's plan and purpose to be fulfilled in Christ and the Lord's accomplishment and work, and there was no Plan B!
The three members of the Trinity all collaborated in this and each had a necessary role to play. If Jesus had to pray for the Father's will to be done, how much more do we? We can be assured that Jesus identifies fully with the weaknesses of our flesh and can adequately intercede on our behalf--for he recognized that the flesh was weak, even though the spirit can be willing, meaning we're only human. Jesus didn't rely upon his supernatural powers to make it through the Garden of Gethsemane experience and was immediately strengthened by an angel after he had sweat like drops of blood to show what angst He was experiencing. We can be assured that Jesus was tempted in all manners as we are, yet without sin (cf. Heb. 4:15), and no one has surpassed the way He defeated Satan's temptations.
A silversmith refines his metal until he can see himself in it, getting out all the dross. God does so with us, and when He can see the reflection of Himself in us He is pleased with our sanctification process. Once a famous sculptor was asked how he could make a horse out of an odd piece of stone; he replied that all he had to do is take away everything that didn't look like a horse! God does likewise with us, taking away our human shortcomings and perfecting virtue and godliness in our character and takes away everything that doesn't resemble Jesus.
Jesus was honest enough to warn us of the trials we would face, possibly even the test of martyrdom and our crosses pale in comparison to His. He didn't ask us to do anything He didn't do Himself, for He always practiced what He preached and preached what He practiced. It is the trials, adversities, temptations, divine discipline, and suffering from calamity et al. that God brings into our lives that is for our own good (Rom. 8:28 says: "... [Al]l things work together for good..."). We do not build character by an easy life without these difficulties and this is God's way of building our character.
Experience is not what happens to you, but in you, it is well said. What do you do with your experiences? The reason bad things happen to good people (and bad people!--and there are no good people!) is that the same sun melts the butter, hardens the clay or people either become bitter or better by the same experience! There is such a thing as negative stress that works for our benefit and keeps us from becoming weak people. It was discovered by Viktor Frankl during WWII that, if a prisoner in a concentration camp knew the "why," he could endure any "how." Modern psychology denies that suffering can have meaning and be beneficial to our character.
And so we must expect a difficult life, not a bed of roses! It's is the sign of God's love letters sent in mysterious envelopes. Oftentimes they come so we can find out what kind of person we are because God already knows. Job courageously and patiently said, "But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold" (Job 23:10). We can endure any trial if we realize this and that there is a reason for it. No cross, no crown! Jesus didn't exempt Himself from the rough roads and will be with us in ours. "My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest" (cf. Ex. 33:19). Isaiah says, "Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver, I have tried you in the furnace of affliction" (Is. 48:10, ESV).
When we suffer for Christ, consider it an honor to suffer for His name's sake and there is a great reward. Let's thank God for the manifold opportunities trials bring to witness and share in the sufferings of Christ. "... [E]ven Christ learned obedience from what he suffered" (Heb. 5:8). Lay out the welcome mat and rejoice in sufferings like Paul and Silas in jail singing unto the Lord--they are friends and opportunities to find new ways to trust God's providence in all circumstances. The trials are inevitable and no one is promised an easy path to heaven as in the book I Never Promised You a Rose Garden. We could not grow without this negative stress and it is God's pruning process--not punishing process! "Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?" (Job 2:10). "... [F]or he does not willingly afflict, or grieve the children of men" (Lam. 3:33, ESV). Our faith is more precious than gold or silver and must be tested to see if it is the genuine article.
Jesus didn't have to go to the cross because He knew all things are possible with God; He asked for a way out, but in the end, He exercised faith in the Father in His commitment to His will. His prayer was not answered in the affirmative, but God assured Him that He would be with Him throughout it. So don't be surprised if God doesn't answer all your prayers as "yes!" "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you..." (Isa. 43:2a, ESV). But His hour of trial guaranteed it would be voluntary and He ratified the agreement He made in heaven to secure our salvation. Jesus was a man on a mission and was born to die and He knew that only He could accomplish our salvation--He could then proclaim, "Mission accomplished!" He did this at Calvary after His cry of dereliction ("tetelestai," "Paid in Full," or "It is finished."). The reason He asked for a way out, is because He knew what He was getting into--a taste of hell itself on our behalf, or a separation from the Father. Jesus suffered this punishment of hell so we wouldn't have to--this is called penal substitution. He is our substitute and now represents us to the Father interceding at His right hand. Soli Deo Gloria!
