A testimony is to attest to a first-hand account and account for it--it is hard to argue, like a man saying, "I was blind, but now I see." In a testimony, we give the synopsis of our life before conversion, how we got converted, and life after the leap, so to speak. Before the conversion, there is unrest and perplexity, then there is a turning point or climax, then there is peace, fulfillment and rest in Christ according to Billy Graham. They all tell of the person's personal pilgrimage and usually don't spare the details, as some like to glorify the past. I will spare you the details; believe me, I was a bad boy and a prodigal son and went through the school of hard knocks and had to come to the end of myself before I would cry out to the Lord in saving faith. I was surely depraved and knew it; I had been there and done that!
Conversion is the act of repentance, faith, and regeneration all occurring together by an act of God ("Salvation is of the Lord.") We do the repenting and believing and God does the regenerating which is passive. Faith is a gift of God and repentance is just the flip side that occurs simultaneously; it is either believing repentance or penitent faith that saves.
My first step was to admit my need; like they say the preacher has to get the lost before he can save them. I was at my wit's end and at the end of my rope! Confirmation in the Lutheran church had been to no avail and I had lost what faith I had in college. It was in the Army that I came to know the Lord. I was not a very good soldier and didn't think I was going to make it as the loner I was. I wasn't getting out of life what I wanted and was existential in my philosophy thinking there was no purpose in life but to party. But I don't want to give "too much info!"
Before I was saved my life was dominated by sin and pleasing myself; I had no peace of mind and was looking ours for Number One! There seemed to be pleasure in sin for a season as I went to the bar scenes and learned to drink. I was also looking for love in all the wrong places if you know what I mean. I was separated from God and there was a cleavage or chasm between us. My life was empty, void and seemed boring in a vacuum. I yearned to have a relationship with God, not just know that He exists, and didn't know what I was searching for; however, I wanted to know the truth. As Pascal said, "There is a God-shaped vacuum in us that only God can fill." And Augustine said, "Our hearts are restless till they find their rest in Thee."
We are made to know God and have a relationship with Him. I like Psalm 107:2 which says, "Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story ("Let the redeemed of the Lord say so"); if you have been redeemed speak up, in other words! Now how I got saved listening to Billy Graham. I was listening to the sermon being translated into Korean and it was going so slow I got every point he made! He was talking of repentance and that seemed the missing link in my life that I had never done; I had to renounce sin for good. First I realized my need: "Indeed it is the straightedge of the law that shows us how crooked we really are" (Rom. 3:20). Then I recognized that Christ was indeed God in the flesh who died on my behalf personally. I received Christ with saving faith, which is either called believing repentance or penitent faith as my personal Lord and Savior. Note that I realized that repentance was imperative or mandatory according to Acts 17:30, "Now He commands all men everywhere to repent." Acts 3:19 says, "Repent and turn to God that your sins may be blotted out and times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord."
I made a clear commitment that was a response to the wooing or tug of the Holy Spirit and I literally gave up, surrendered, and committed to following Christ. I went from the "gutter most to the uttermost." The result is not that I am everything I ought to be, but thank God I'm not what I used to be! I have peace with God, others, and myself ("Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God..."; "My peace I give unto you..."; "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace....")
I have an assurance that I am going to heaven because I am not ignorant of God's Word and take Him at His Word. "He that comes to me I will in no wise cast out" (John 6:37). This is my spiritual birth certificate you could say! As they say: "God said it in His Word, I believe it in my heart, that settles it in my mind." Most important I have an abundant and fulfilling life according to His promise of abundant life with a capital L (in short purpose in living). I am now learning to overcome sin, know His will and seek His kingdom. But faith is manifest only in obedience; it has legs and must be followed by action or it is dead (no fruit, no faith);we must turn our beliefs into deeds, for we are saved unto good works though not by them, and we are His masterpiece (says Paul in Eph. 2:10). Soli Deo Gloria!
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